How To Be the Mom Your Quinceanera Needs

Have you heard the news lately about the increase in high school teen pregnancy this year? Some people are screaming, “Where are their mothers”?

I’m sure many of the mothers have been saying, “My daughter won’t talk to me”. All my daughter does is argue with me and then she runs off crying or yelling at me. Does that sound familiar?

In the book I authored: Quinceanera Connection: Your Dream Celebration On Any Budget, I wrote, “your daughter may be begging for Independence, but she wants your approval now”.

It might seem impossible to be the ‘perfect mom’ of a teen, but you can do it. There was no instruction manual when you delivered your daughter. Nor did you ever think about the challenges you both would have when she entered puberty and then celebrated her right-of-passage and beyond.

The secret is to start communicating as early as possible with your daughter about what she will encounter when her body starts to make changes.

• She needs to hear from her loving mother, being born female is a gift from God.
• A gift she should be proud of and cherish.
  
• A gift she should not share until she is old enough and wise enough to make the right choices.
  

During one of my many interviews when I was performing the research for my book. One of the interviews was with Isabel. She said, " my mother never told me about what she should expect with the changes in my body".

Isabel said she was totally unprepared. She was embarrassed when she started to menstruate. It came on at school. She thought she was dying. She ran to the school nurse for help.

• She never had a close relationship with her mother again.
• She didn’t trust her mother any longer to be her guide.
• She felt her mother let her down.

Isabel’s story was sad. She said she made the wrong choices. She had a baby when she was in college. She knew she didn’t want to have anything to do with the child's father. She dropped out of school.

• She didn’t tell her mother until the baby was about to be born.
• Unfortunately, the baby was born with serious health problems.
• As she was telling me her story, I could hear anger in her voice. It was possibly the same anger she felt when she believed her mother let her down.

Start today: become your daughter’s teacher not her preacher:

• Your role as the mother of a teen has changed.
• However, your daughter needs you more than ever before.
• She needs you to listen to her problems without criticism.
• She wants to feel like a grownup, but she is scared.
• Everyday she has all the social pressures to deal with at school.
• Her body and hormones are changing constantly.
• One day someone is her best friend the next day her enemy.
• She needs you more than ever before.

A few secrets to start with:

• Ask your daughter to help you with a simple task that you can both do together. – Preferably something fun.
• Praise her for her help.
• Tell her you love her and talk about something positive.
• Then let her talk. JUST LISTEN.
• If she doesn’t say anything. That’s fine. After you both are finished with the task. Give her a big hug. Tell her you love her and appreciate her help.
• Let a few days go by. Then ask for her help again for something simple and quick. Repeat the process.
• Then follow up each day and without asking for her help…give her a hug and thank her for being such an important part of your life.

Your daughter will start to feel she can trust you. You will have reconnected with love and without anger and yelling.

I’m planning on writing an e book about the important role a mother has in her daughter's life. From my research I've found if a teen girl doesn’t have a close trusting, loving relationship with her mother. She runs off into the arms of a boy and she makes the wrong choices.

I invite you join a group of mothers who want the best for their daughter.

Please - call me toll free at (866) 478-4623 or email me at:
Priscilla@quinceaneraconnect.com. So we can chat about your relationship with your daughter. I will share my research with you.

Your daughter’s Quinceanera will be more meaningful for everyone involved when you – speak from your heart and don’t criticize her.

All the best,
Priscilla
PS: Until my e book is published, you will find my book- Quinceanera Connection-“Parent Talk” section very helpful for creating a loving, trusting relationship with your Quinceanera. For a limited time you will also receive your free bonus/gift of a 70-page Quinceanera
e planner. – BUY NOW! free shipping.

Seven Secrets for Having an Amazing Quinceanera on a Small Budget

I received a call from Elena, a mom who told me she had always "dreamed of giving her daughter a beautiful Quinceanera". I was nearly in tears when I heard her story. Elena said, she had been in a serious accident and the family was just getting back on their feet. Not only did she have to deal with the trauma of an accident... her medical bills were huge and overwhelming.

Elena had purchased my book: Quinceanera Connection: Your Dream Celebration On Any Budget. She wanted to share her ideas and what she was considering doing for her daughter's Quinceanera after reading my book.

Elena said, " she now believed, it was possible for her to have a beautiful Quinceanera celebration for her daughter - that would fit into her small budget."

Elena was delighted she was well enough to plan her daughter's Quince fiesta. She said it was fine for me to share what she was planning to do and write about it on my blog. She felt it would be helpful for other mom's to know "you don't need to spend a lot of money in order to fulfill your dreams".

The following are 7 tips from her long list for having a " amazing Quinceanera on a small budget:"

1. Together the family reviewed the proposed guest list. After much discussion they cut the guest list in half. They shared it was better to have a small Quinceanera celebration than not have one at all. They decided to only invite family members and close friends. They still had guest list of almost 100 people.

2. Her daughter with the help of other family members decided on a color theme for her Quinceanera party. In order to save money they are planning on making everything except:

• The Quinceanera dress
• The album
• The tiara

(They set up a planning workbook with pages set aside for color samples and pictures for everything they were thinking of making.)

3. Each of the Quinceanera's sisters volunteered to take on a different responsibility for the party.

• Her older sister who had taken cake decorating classes offered to bake her a special birthday cake.
  
• They decided to test different types of cakes and fillings and invite a few family members and friends for a cake testing party. (Sounds like lots of fun to me)

4. Another sister likes taking pictures and making things with photos. She offered to take pictures of the Quinceanera's friends and place them in cute frames she will decorate. These will be used as place card holders and mementos for her friends to take home.

5. They decided on a menu and are asking certain family members to make a specific dish. The food will be served buffet style. Other family members are being asked to bring beverages.

6. A close friend of the family is a videographer. He was asked if he would take the video of the Quinceanera's special day. Knowing the family was experiencing a financial hardship ... he said he would be honored to produce the video of her "Quinceanera celebration story".

7. The major decision was where to hold the Quinceanera Celebration. The family home is too small for the fiesta. Elena is in the process of asking family members if they could use their home for the party. They have had a few offers and are deciding which one will be the best for the "spectacular Quinceanera Celebration".

"Elena turned a challenge into an amazing and fun - family project."

I would love to hear your own ideas and experiences. Please leave me a comment here or email me at: Priscilla@quinceaneraconnect.com

The Quinceanera tradition dating back to the early 1500's was a community event. Everyone participated with either making handmade gifts, dresses, handicrafts, music and food or what ever was needed to create a "spectacular celebration".

All the best,
Priscilla
PS: The bonus-gift of the very popular ... 70-page Quinceanera eplanner is still available with the purchase of my book- Quinceanera Connection: Your Dream Celebration On Any Budget. "A value of $25.00 for only $12.95 with free shipping."

Mom - the unsung heroine of the Quinceanera

The dictionary definition of heroine is: a mythological or legendary woman having the qualities of a hero b: a woman admired and emulated for her achievements and qualities.

Even the dictionary makes reference to the male hero to define the feminine extraordinary woman. The heroine or the Goddess.

Yes, mom de la Quinceanera is the unsung heroine. Whether it's planning your daughter's Quinceanera or helping other family members in need of your help it's more than likely you to the rescue. Who comes to your rescue when your feet hurt so much you can hardly walk?

But, unsung means you quietly perform what ever is required, without asking for help. You probably do it all on your own.

I hear all to often that's what's happening to mom's when they are planning their daughters Quinceanera. But, please share with me whose fault is it? Do you ask for help? Did you make a list and ask friends and family to help with different tasks? If you can say yes, then you are a smart good delegater. And, a good role model for your daughter. If you answered no. You need to spend some alone time and figure out a plan to get some assistance in order for you to not get stressed and avoid getting sick.

My first recommendation is to purchase my book: Quinceanera Connection: Your Dream Celebration On Any Budget. The book is the perfect guide for helping you to be organized and it contains all the tips and tools you need when planning a large event. It's the best investment you can make.

Everyone who has read it, says they can't stop reading it and then they refer to it on all the time. The bonus - 70 page Quinceanera eplanner you get when you buy my book, will help you with every step of your planning process. Plus, the usual hectic last week and the day of the Quinceanera will all come together with ease. You will avoid costly mistakes and you will save money. Because of the 101 tips and information noted in the book, you will be able to not only be the heroine, you will enjoy being the Queen.

In fact... if it was up to me I would make sure every mother wore a crown at her daughter's Quinceanera Celebration. Mom's deserve special recognition. Maybe, I should start a trend and promote a crown for mom de la Quinceanera.

What do you think? Would you wear one? Please let me know. For the next two weeks everyone who phones me, will be asked that question. I will then post the answers here.

Enjoy, relax, take care of yourself.

All the best,
Priscilla

Creating Magic When Planning your Quinceanera Celebration

Wow...I've been receiving phone calls from Mom's of the Quinceanera who are starting to plan their daughter's celebration two years ahead of time. Each mom shared they feel if they purchase the things they need for their daughters celebration a little at a time they can afford to have the dream party they had always hoped to have.

Thoughts from other mom's-

Elizabeth, one of the moms shared; she feels there is no financial burden on the family this way. Instead of spending small amounts of money on unnecessary day to day things, she is saving and buying things as she goes along planning her daughter's Quinceanera celebration.

Alma, another mom I spoke with said: 'after I make my purchase I put it in a special place for safe keeping. My daughter and I look at everything at least once every few weeks. We have a list of what we want to buy and we have so much fun checking out everything all the time'. I could hear the joy in her voice. It was magical.

I've found when I plan a party or vacation it's as much fun as the actual experience it self. Don't miss out on the double fun. It's important to take enough time during the planning process so everyone has the opportunity to share in the double fun and excitement. First during the planning process and then the actual celebration.

That's why it's so important to leave enough time to enjoy every experience along the way.

Think about how wonderful it's to watch your favorite movie twice. Don't you enjoy the movie more the second time? Don't you feel more comfortable because you've been there before?

I know for myself I miss things the first time when I see a movie. The second time I see new things and have a new magical experience.

Plan ahead make the planning process a lot of fun and a magical bonding happening for everyone involved in your daughter's Quinceanera celebration.

BUY NOW- your perfect guide-book with the bonus 70 page Quinceanera eplanner to help you create your daughter's magical day.

Quince Girls' need Mom to Listen with Love & Understanding

Planning your daughter's Quinceanera takes lots of time and effort. Some days, I bet you wonder, how are you going to make it. But you do! That's being a mom. I wanted to share your daughter has her own challenges as she helps you with the planning of her Quinceanera celebration.

Most likely she is in high school now and that's a social shock for all girls. Your daughter needs you more than ever before. As I wrote in my book: Quinceanera Connection: Your Dream Celebration On Any Budget. In the 'Parent Talk Section', I discuss how important it's for every teenager to have a trusting sounding board to be heard with love and without judgment.

So often teens say- 'no one ever listens to me', because there is so much emotion in the conversations, no can really listen. The best way is too just listen. Listen with love and understanding.

Treat your daughter the way you want to be treated. Ask her how her day was. Tell her you love her, especially on those difficult days. Speak with a loving and caring voice. Don't criticize. listen...listen ...listen...

I want to share a new blog entry on my web site www.QuinceaneraConnect.com. Michelle's Blog is written by Michelle, a freshman in high school who is planning her Quinceanera. She and her mom have a beautiful relationship, but they had to work at it. I think Michelle has expressed her feelings and thoughts very well, about the challenges teen girl's have about 'boys'. I recommend you read her blog entry and have your daughter read it also. Then discuss it. Hear what she has to say. Michelle writes from her heart and soul the truth. That's what life is all about. Being true to yourself first.

All the best,
Priscilla

Save Money- Exquisite Quinceanera Dresses Below Wholesale

Getting a REAL deal has always been fun for me. My father taught me when I was a young girl, how to make the dollars I earned from my allowance go a long way. I was rewarded when I did comparison shopping and knew what things were worth. Till this day I still make sure I'm aware of the value of what I purchase.

Before I place anything on quinceaneraconnect.com website, I compare all other products on the web. I check out other companies shipping rates and I make sure I'm giving my customers the best deal.

When, I met Cande and heard that she had to close her Quinceanera/Bridal shop, because her landlord doubled her rent when her lease was to be renewed. She had to close the business her mother had started 35 years ago.

She had just received her new order of Quinceanera dresses/gowns and she couldn't return them. OUCH!

I told her that I would help her out by placing pictures and some information about her inventory on my site. I get no profit from the sale of these dresses. I wanted both my customers and Cande to benefit.

There are only nine or so gowns left. In limited colors and sizes. If you are the lucky one grab it. We will keep your secret and not let anyone know you got such a great deal.

This is the link ... more information regarding the Quinceanera dresses

What Mom's de la Quinceanera Must Know About The Teen Brain

As you're planning your daughter's special day in her life. Her Quinceanera Celebration. At times you probably find it difficult for both of you. It's not because you aren't a great mom or your daughter isn't a wonderful person. It's that she is a teen in an adults body.

Interesting scientific information has been brought to my attention today and I thought I would share it with you. Through the use of MRI's and other research studies neuroscientists at the National Institute of Mental Health have shown that a teens' brain is not fully developed until his/her early twenties. What this means is that most teens can't be expected to make decisions on a consistent basis like an adult can. The part of the brain that controls their decision making process is the frontal lobe, which is still process of developmental growth.

Dr. Jay Giedd, lead researcher at the National institute of Health using MRI scans demonstrates by comparing the adult brain to the teen brain, the teen brain uses unlike pathways as the adult brain to make decisions. Dr. Giedd's studies show that for many teens this area of the brain is not developed until the early 20's. Teens instead use another area of the brain for making decisions. The area of the brain teens use controls the arousal, fear and the overall teens emotional state.

Therefore, when a teenager makes a decision many times he/she is influenced by the excitement of the moment and rather than the long term consequences regarding his/her decision.

If you missed the Good Morning America segment on Spring Break behavior you will find this very interesting information. The behavior on the video is such that I don't think any parent would want to see it. However, education is the best prevention of this ever happening to someone in your family. Watching the video with your daughter and discussing both of your observations without judgment will help both of you.

Dr. Giedd states,'The brain is largely wired for social interaction and for bonding with caretakers. And sometimes it's even disappointing to people with all the science and all the advances that the best advice we can give is things that our grandmother could have told us generations ago: to spend loving and quality time with our children...'.

Glenn Goldberg, J.D., R.C. Adolescent Specialist and Parent Coach, states: Most parents of teens have experienced bad attitudes and disrespectful communication. It's not fun, but it's normal...Understanding more about your teenager's still developing brain may help release some of your hurt, resentment and confusion. It also may encourage you to give your child some extra grace, patience and compassion as they complete their passage from being a dependent child to an independent adult.

I thought this is a very important piece of information to share with you as your daughter celebrates her right of passage at her Quinceanera Celebration. This knowledge will help both of you better understand her need for your support and guidance as she matures into a lovely young woman.

I have placed some links for those of you who would like to learn more about the subject of the Teen Brain and it's development and the reason why teens follow the behavior of the group even when it puts them in danger. Education is power.

I recommend you share this information with your daughter. Discuss your areas of concern. It will bring you both closer together. Your days will be filled with more sunshine. You can also check out my blog on the same subject at Ask Priscilla.

Other links:
The Teen Brain by Glenn Goldberg- J.D. R.C. Adolescent Specialist
Inside the Teenage Brain- interview with Dr. Jay Giedd by PBS
Spring Break Confessions -video